How to Lift Yourself Out of Negativity如何驱赶负面情绪?

赖彩云 Jessy Lai Chai Yun-negatively

How to Lift Yourself Out of Negativity

As much as I believe in working hard, seizing opportunities and not letting negativities beat you down, there are times where negative emotions can come and there is just no quick fix for it.

We all have our times with negativity. Some of us get over it faster than others, but it is a human condition that no one is absolutely immune form.

When I was much younger I’d learned how to let go of those negative emotions. I’d learned about discarding old habits that were no longer serving me, accepting situations, fostering a positive mindset, and trying to find solutions to problems without allowing negativity to hold me back.

As I grew older, I realised that while being strong and positive are great traits, it is also important to not shame myself when I feel down.

It’s easy to feel guilty about not being positive all the time, but we’re only human. It’s okay to have low times, so long as we don’t let them consume us.

Here are some tips I use to gently coach myself out of negativity, without guilt-tripping myself for having human emotions.

1. Realize that the only way out is through

Understand that we all experience difficult emotions, and it is OK. Own these emotions and observe them even as you are feeling it.

I felt a string of mixed emotions when my career was having troubles. Mostly, I felt lost and insecure because of where I was in life, because my friends and colleagues were doing well while I was trying to just survive.

Obstacles and bad feelings are unavoidable. By letting myself feel them, I was eventually able to move beyond them.

The easiest way to handle this is to give yourself a time limit. For example, when a loved one passes away, I tell myself that I am allowed to feel sad and mourn over it for one week. After one week, I will pick myself up and move on. By doing this, I allow myself time to experience the ups and downs of life, while having the assurance that these negativity won’t hold me back for long.

2. Realize your triggers.

It’s easier to deal with an issue if you understand it. Take some time and reflect; break down and identifying your fears, unknowns, and events that can cause you to feel negative. Proceed to analyse why these events affect you, and try to figure out how to cope. This exercise gives clarity into what you can change, face, or let go.

For example, your fears might be related to being financially stable and having good relationships with your family. Realising what bothers you can help you understand yourself better, prepare you for unfortunate events, and help you plan your life better.

Create space between you and issues. That means that you are taking a step back from your emotions and taking a look at what you’re experiencing a little more objectively.

3. Be grateful.

Gratitude is a powerful tool. It’s the first step to setting a good mindset. I would not be unrealistic and say you have to be grateful about everything including the horrible ones. But I will say even identifying a few things everyday to be grateful for can be really helpful.

If you have a roof over your head, a job, a few people who care for you, and internet connection to read this post, you are much better off than many others in our society.

Reminding yourself to be grateful allows you to see some the goodness in your life, regardless of what you’re going through. It makes you feel better, and it helps you stay grounded, realising that your life is not as bad as it might seem right now.

如何驱赶负面情绪?

虽然我相信努力工作、抓紧机会并且不被负面情绪打败,但还是无法避免坏情绪偶尔找上门!

每个人都有坏情绪的时候,有些人能很快的就找出方法解决它,但目前为止,人类还是无法寻获任何一个方式以杜绝坏情绪。

年轻时,我已经学会如何与负面情绪共处,我改掉那些对我一点害处也没有的坏习惯、学会接受改变、建立积极的想法、学会正视问题并设法解决它。

当我年纪越来越大,我领悟了坚强以及正面的乐观固然是一件好事,倘若拥有负面情绪,也不是一件羞愧的事。

有些人的确会为了自己并不是无时无刻乐观而感到愧疚,但我想告诉你,我们只是一个拥有七情六欲的人类,偶尔拥有低落的情绪是一件很正常的事,只是我们需做的是尽量不要让负面的我情绪占领我们而已!

在这里,我想跟大家分享我如何打败负面情情绪的一些贴士。

1.放下才是解决之道。

你需要明白我们每一个人都有低落的时候,这不是什么错事。面对自己所有的情绪包括与负面情绪共处本来就是我们的功课之一。

当我事业出现困难时,我也曾为此感到低落。很多时候,看到周遭的人活得很好而我自己还在寻找出路的时候,我感到迷失并没有安全感。

但我只搭配遮掩的情绪不能占有我思绪太久,于是我选择正视这些问题,以为我知道唯有这么做,我才能真正的放下。

而最简单的我方式就是给自己限定一个时间,在这个时间内,你可以尽情的沉浸在悲伤里,但一旦过了这个期限,你必须振作!例如,自己做要好的亲人去世了,你可以给自己伤心难过一个星期,但一星期过去后,你要告诉自己,要重新站起来继续好好的生活,绝对不要让负面的情绪滞留太久。

2.找出心中的恐惧

找一个时间坐下来精心的反思,让自己赤裸裸地面对所有会导致你产生恐惧之感的事情。好好的分析为何这些事情会影响你,再想办法寻找解决方式。这样的方式能帮助你找出心中的恐惧。

例如,你的恐惧可能与财务以及与家人进行稳定的感情。认清阻碍你的原因后,你将会更认识自己,如此一来,你更加能为自己的生活打算。

3. 学会感恩

感恩是一个很有力量的工具,也是建立正面想法的第一步。我并不是告诉你要感激所有的人事物包括哪些不好的事情,但我会告诉你每一天感恩几样在你生活中出出现并对你有所帮助的事情就是正确的第一步。

若现在的你有一间能遮风挡雨的屋子、有一份工作、身边也围绕着许多关心你的人并有缘分阅读到本篇文章,老实说,你已经比社会上其他不幸的人来的幸运了。

无论你正经历着什么,保持感恩之心会让你看见生命中许多美好的事情,让你能脚踏实地的活着,你就会明白你的人生并没有如你想象的那么糟糕!

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