How to Lift Yourself Out of Negativity
As much as I believe in working hard, seizing opportunities and not letting negativities beat you down, there are times where negative emotions can come and there is just no quick fix for it.
We all have our times with negativity. Some of us get over it faster than others, but it is a human condition that no one is absolutely immune form.
When I was much younger I’d learned how to let go of those negative emotions. I’d learned about discarding old habits that were no longer serving me, accepting situations, fostering a positive mindset, and trying to find solutions to problems without allowing negativity to hold me back.
As I grew older, I realised that while being strong and positive are great traits, it is also important to not shame myself when I feel down.
It’s easy to feel guilty about not being positive all the time, but we’re only human. It’s okay to have low times, so long as we don’t let them consume us.
Here are some tips I use to gently coach myself out of negativity, without guilt-tripping myself for having human emotions.
1. Realize that the only way out is through
Understand that we all experience difficult emotions, and it is OK. Own these emotions and observe them even as you are feeling it.
I felt a string of mixed emotions when my career was having troubles. Mostly, I felt lost and insecure because of where I was in life, because my friends and colleagues were doing well while I was trying to just survive.
Obstacles and bad feelings are unavoidable. By letting myself feel them, I was eventually able to move beyond them.
The easiest way to handle this is to give yourself a time limit. For example, when a loved one passes away, I tell myself that I am allowed to feel sad and mourn over it for one week. After one week, I will pick myself up and move on. By doing this, I allow myself time to experience the ups and downs of life, while having the assurance that these negativity won’t hold me back for long.
2. Realize your triggers.
It’s easier to deal with an issue if you understand it. Take some time and reflect; break down and identifying your fears, unknowns, and events that can cause you to feel negative. Proceed to analyse why these events affect you, and try to figure out how to cope. This exercise gives clarity into what you can change, face, or let go.
For example, your fears might be related to being financially stable and having good relationships with your family. Realising what bothers you can help you understand yourself better, prepare you for unfortunate events, and help you plan your life better.
Create space between you and issues. That means that you are taking a step back from your emotions and taking a look at what you’re experiencing a little more objectively.
3. Be grateful.
Gratitude is a powerful tool. It’s the first step to setting a good mindset. I would not be unrealistic and say you have to be grateful about everything including the horrible ones. But I will say even identifying a few things everyday to be grateful for can be really helpful.
If you have a roof over your head, a job, a few people who care for you, and internet connection to read this post, you are much better off than many others in our society.
Reminding yourself to be grateful allows you to see some the goodness in your life, regardless of what you’re going through. It makes you feel better, and it helps you stay grounded, realising that your life is not as bad as it might seem right now.