When the world is cruel, be kind to yourself当伤痛来袭,別隱藏,請对自己好一点!

赖彩云 Jessy Lai Chai Yu—sad

When the world is cruel, be kind to yourself

We all go through some bad days. When it happens, far too often we refuse to allow ourselves some down time. We beat ourselves up for having emotions, and think that the only way to display strength is to shut out our feelings and pretend like nothing happened.

Why do we do this to ourselves?

Every one of us have experienced one kind of problem or another—be it in our studies, work, relationships or anything else. Some of us are so hardened to these situations that we no longer cry, complain or even express sadness to our loved ones. We even refuse to acknowledge that we are legitimately upset.

Why do we conflate emotional shutdowns with strength and maturity? Could it be that when we deny our emotions, we are merely running away from reality, and refusing to acknowledge our humanity?

I recently saw a video on ET Today. A martial arts coach is teaching his student to break wooden planks. The young student was so afraid that he could not hit hard, and ended up crying. When asked why was he crying, he said its because he’s not confident enough to break the wooden plank.

The coach allowed the student to cry, and then he told the boy: “I would not stop you from crying, because I do that too. But I want to tell you that life is full of obstacles, and we have to face them no matter what. We might shy away from challenges because we are afraid of getting hurt, but we can’t allow ourselves to do that. In the end, we need to man up and fight.”

I was very moved by the video. The coach wasn’t only teaching the boy about martial arts. He was giving him a valuable life lesson. Just like the coach said, no one can stop you from crying or feeling upset. You could very well talk about your feelings, allow yourself some space to recover.

Don’t trick yourself into thinking that denial is a solution. Time never really does heal anything unless you are willing to face the problem up front.

Therefore, go ahead and own your emotions—the good, the bad and the ugly.

When you’re done, remember to pick yourself up and move on. Tomorrow is a new day, and you can get back on track being your amazing self.








最近在台湾东森新闻(ET Today)看到一个短片,里面有一位拳击教练要他的学员用力的使出左手击破板子,小小年纪的学员心里有障碍,总是无法使力,最后他哭了。教练问他为何苦?他说自己的左手没有力,他没有信心能击破板子。

教练静静的让小学员哭,之后告诉他,“我不会阻止你哭,因为我面对挫折时候我也会哭, 但我想告诉你,我们的生命中总会遇见各式各样的考验,即便是很困难的挑战,无论如何我们都要去面对,我知道面对困难会很痛苦很难过,遇到障碍,我们总想着要停止向前,那是因为会受伤会痛,会不想再经历这样的事,但我们却要像个男人一样奋斗,即使真的很痛苦!”




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